Couple praise charity after loosing their baby

Katrina Dowling and Matt Forrest lost their son Charlie, who suffered with cerebral palsy and epilepsy, last November aged 15 months.

Sidley residents Katrina and Matt, have chosen to bravely share their story to help others who may be suffering a similar situation and to raise awareness of the Demelza Hospice, Kent.

Katrina said: "The word hospice never really goes along with the word children does it? Or we never thought it did, until we were told different.

"It all started a few hours after being born. Charlie started fitting and couldn't be controlled by three different types of medication. He was transferred to intensive care and put into an induced coma to give his brain & body a rest as he carried on fitting."

Charlie was given an MRI scan which showed he had swelling on the left side of his brain along with spots of bleeding.

Katrina said: "And then came the news that no family would want to hear - that our little man was severely brain damaged, and that he wouldn't do anything at all."

The couple were first told about Demelza Hospice when Charlie was moved out of intensive care and into the Conquest hospital. Katrina described that day as "a bit of a blur" with Demelza nurses, community nurses, and a charity that could offer a few hours respite a week, visiting them at the hospital. She said:

"This, I think, is when it hit us properly that he was severely disabled and needed 24 hour care. Our life was going to change drastically, but we wouldn't have changed Charlie for anything and we were ready for what was ahead."

Katrina said the Demelza charity was "a Godsend" during the short time Charlie was with them.

Describing the welcome relief the respite care made to their life Katrina said the charity alternately helped care for Charlie and his older brother Jack so the couple could "have a break and be Matt and Trina", took Jack out, and also watched over Charlie so Matt and Katrina could dedicate quality time to Jack. Time, which Katrina said their other son welcomed:

"Charlie needed 24 hour care so Jack missed out and he loved these times with us."

She added: "Charlie's Demelza Nurse was always on the other end of the phone if we were worried about anything and to start with this was often as we worried about any little thing that Charlie did.

"We always knew that Charlie was life limited with a short life expectancy, that's why Demelza were introduced, but it didn't stop us thinking they were wrong and Charlie would prove them wrong - as he did for his short time we had with him.

"He proved the doctors and nurses wrong many times and did what he wanted, when he wanted."

"A month before Charlie passed away he went onto oxygen, and eventually went on to it continuously 24 hours a day. Nearly three weeks before he passed he had a syringe driver just so he was comfortable.

"Then came the day we were told that Charlie's organs were shutting down and he had two weeks to live. Yet again we were in denial and believed Charlie would prove them all wrong but this time it was too much for Charlie and he grew his angel wings on the 29th November."

Before Charlie passed away Matt and Katrina held early Christmas and 1st birthday party celebrations for him .

Katrina said: "Since Charlie has passed away we have been to a bereavement weekend at the hospice and will carry on for as long as we are able to.

"Demelza Hospice is an excellent charity that I never knew about before we had Charlie".

Since Charlie's passing the couple organised two fund raising events for Demelza - a 15 hour pool marathon and a pamper day '“ and raised 2,500 for the charity.

The success of these events has inspired Matt and Katrina to arrange more in the future.

Katrina said: "I hope that many more people will realise what an excellent charity this is. We couldn't have got through without the help they gave."

For more information visit the website at: www.demelza.org.uk